red nails on red week

i should be studying right now (the theme of most my entries recently) but here i am, spending some time to relax my brain from memorizing sections from criminal procedures.

criminal procedures is hard, but it is still more interesting than reading cases for sales. the process for justice is long and tedious. you have to be patient and articulate with all the possibilities that the other party may do to either delay or speed up the whole trial. it all depends on the cards that you play with.

we’re hanging out in a new coffee place. it’s accessible, has an outlet at the smoking area, and most importantly is open 24/7. although i would have liked it better if the brewed coffee was stronger, i have yet to taste their americano. i hope it is more potent than the last one that i drank. the ambiance is cozy and conducive for studying. one day, i would be able to set my own coffee place, with big lounge chairs that would draw you in your own personal fantasies – whether it be reading a good book, or studying. most probably that would be with a good book, or just plain dazing out to a better place from where you are.

tatang just celebrated his 40 days this weekend. i still wish i would be able to see him in my dreams. i keep telling him that i would like to talk to him one more time, but please don’t haunt me while i’m awake. i’m a scaredy cat like that. mom was in a better shape when we visited his grave. tatang lived a full life – he was 95 when he died. bonus stage, if you ask me.

i pause to remember the aromas around me right now. a hint of coffee and baby powder apparently gives me comfort. my eyes are tired, but i still have a long day tomorrow. i should stop blabbering here, but i just have to let out extra thoughts in my head. they might clutter my already cluttered mind. i need all the space i need to be able to memorize all these articles.

what’s bothering me mostly is that my drive is almost none existent. i can’t seem to find the right words to put here, but it gets tiring. bu just like everyone else in the world who has got their own turmoils and challenges to go through day to day, you press on, and move on, because the world will not stop for you. maybe for 30 minutes or so, so that you would be able to write everything down, but it will continue to move on. ironically, on the speed that is the most inappropriate for you. how fast time flies when you are having fun, and a second of darkness seems like an eternity of abyss.

so what is one to do, but be grateful for the things and people around you – a sigh, a scent, a glance

and a wave of energy splashes over you.

time to study again.

i’m out.


Author: angparaluman

a poster girl with no poster staying on the safe side of the road less traveled.

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