i have been planning to write down this entry for a week now, but i guess time was not on my side. there was a lot of things that needed to be done, projects to be made, videos to be edited and fats to be burned (well, this one was just on me) that i had no time to really sit down and talk about it.
last last monday, i was able to listen to a talk entitled “The Reason for the Wait”. Title palang, i wanted to listen to it already. Waiting isn’t my greatest gift which explains why i’d rather be late than early. i know it’s not the best trait, but yes, i TRY to fix it. as they say, admitting is the first step. 🙂
we are all constantly waiting for something. waiting for the bus, waiting for our paychecks, waiting for our grades, waiting for the go from our bosses and i guess, the most important wait everyone goes through is the wait for THE ONE. MR. DREAMBOY. GOD’S GIFT. ang makarating sa puntong sasabihin natin sa ating mga kaibigan na, “siya na nga.
and the wait isn’t really a happy road. lonely nights, terrible hangovers in the morning, no hand to hold on to, no one to greet you good morning and good night… and the dates! the terrible dates with persons that you absolutely have nothing in common that go on just so you wouldn’t feel that lonely or just so you can have someone to watch that new movie with (and hopefully so someone will pay for it too!)
and then when that horrible date is over, you go to your friends and lament your horrible night. whether it was the sucky food, or the dead conversation, we always go back to our self-pity. “Sawang sawa nako sa paghihintay. Ang tagal naman” and of course, every single person’s favorite question: “Mahirap ba akong mahalin?”
BUT, there is good news. WAITING IS GOOD. mejo napa-HUWAT talaga ako jan.i hate waiting pa naman. i am a very impatient person. kung wala, wala. kung meron, meron. ayan tuloy, most of the time, mali ang mga desisyon ko sa buhay. ehehe. BUT ANYWAY… on with the talk…
it’s not that Direk does not answer our questions. and it’s not that Direk wants us to be happy. there are certain things that Direk wants us to achieve before He even gives us what we want. kung tutuusin, isang pitik lang ni Direk, kaya niya naman ibigay lahat yan e. but will we be grateful for it? will we even value its worth if it is just given to us right away? i honestly wouldn’t.
and so we wait. we wait so we develop better traits, great memories that later on when we get what we want, we would later on realize that the wait wasn’t so bad after all.
1. God is purging the non-essentials in your life.
Abay, oo nga naman. take for example. we pray that we be given that job we have prayed for so long. e lasenggero ka to the point na hindi ka na nakakapasok. so if he gives you the job right away, would you be in the best capacity to take care of that job? malamang wala pang 2 months e wala na yung dream job mo. what are these other non-essentials in our lives? the insecurities (that often leads to endless arguments with our partners), hang-ups (ahum…) and fears. shempre, when Direk gives us our dreamboys, sayang naman if we spoil it with our excess baggages. i’m sure you wouldn’t want your dreamboy to have excess baggages (or balikbayan boxes) too, right? A change of life does not mean a change of character. my mom always tells me, “you can never change your man.” the change must come from within. so kung barubal na ang boyfriend mo, ganyan na yan forever. hassle diba.
2. God is strengthening you.
everytime i go through a break-up, my favorite imagery is the carabao. iniisip ko ako ang kalabaw na nginungudngod sa putik paulit ulit. pero katulad ng kalabaw na favorite ang putikan, sa putik siya kumukuha ng lakas. (teka.. si nardong putik ata yon….) it is in this “gawd please kill me because the hurting is too much” phase that Direk is honing us to be a stronger better person. and i’m sure everyone who is reading this would be nodding and saying “oo nga.” ika nga ni Regine “you’ve made me stronger by breaking my heart….” hehe.
3. God is preparing your gift and He wants you to prepare for it!
mahilig ako sa mga moreno. i have nothing against meztizo people, but i just feel they look, hilaw. i like my man well tanned or maitim (actually, para lang mukha akong maputi. JOKE!) and just like the color of their skin, i would like Direk to prepare my dreamboy well, not raw, not half baked, but well done. and of course, again, gusto ko naman by the time na iharap na sakin ni Direk si Dreamboy, sana naman karapat dapat na ko diba!
4.God wants His will and your will to be one!
magaling din tong si Direk eh. in fairness, ako, matigas talaga ang ulo ko. with all the previous relationships i had, i either gambled, or settled. i didn’t let Him do his magic. or even if i did, i used human intervention and predicted His words to my own interpretation.. so malamang palpak diba.
so waiting shouldn’t be a burden for us. it should be exciting like a child waiting for Christmas day. kung feeling mo sobrang yon na talaga ang the best na maibibigay mo and feeling mo you can settle for what you have lost, think of the things you are about to gain. who are we to question Direk? kaya nga sha naging Direk diba?
i’d just like to say that these 4 points didn’t come from me. it came directly from the talk given by the brother of ate vannie. (sorry ate vannie!! i forgot his name!! super nakikinig kasi ako sa talk niya and nagsusulat!! hahah!!!)
so now i wait silently and excitedly for the things Direk has planned for me. i might be a good planner (and hopefully not a late one already) but He is the Ultimate Planner. so bring it on Direk, steady lang ako dito. i heard ya!
i’d like to end this entry with a quote from Oz Hillman:
We are often more focused on the outcome than the process that He is accomplishing in our lives each day. When we experience His presence daily, one day we wake up and realize that God has done something special in and through our lives. however, the accomplishment is no longer what excites us. instead, what excites us is knowing Him. Through those times, we become more acquainted with His love, grace, and power in our lives. When this happens, we are no longer focused on the outcome because the outcome is a result of our walk with Him. it is not the goal of our walk, but the by-product.