can’t smile without you

mood: loved
music: Can’t Smile Without You – Barry Manilow

WHAT A DAY IT HAS BEEN.

actually, it has been a rough week, really. its been hard, obviously because i didn’t get to log in yesterday… my computer broke down earlier today and being the illiterate that i am.. i had no idea what was going on through the whole system, and so i called the help line thingy and they asked me what was wrong… the only thing i was able to tell them was,

“um, my computer won’t start and the blue line under the Microsoft XP thingy just keeps on running.”

i know i sounded like an idiot.

well, idiot as i am, i got to fix my own computer. (yipee!!) which wasnt so bad afterall, the only bad thing about it was all my files were deleted.. and i tried to save it in a cd (1st time i have ever done that) and now that im trying to retrieve it it wouldn’t bloody work!

did i just use the word BLOODY?

bloody hell.

must be the british flu gettin a bite at me.

well anyway, bad news as usual, they have secured and occupied my friendster account. posted really nasty stuff about me using my account. obviously my bewildered friends were left either with hanging jaws or undeniable disbelief on what was written. they either thought that it was true or that must have been one hell of a drug!! haha!!! ran about 8 kilometers rather than shouting at joshua again.. i deleted the two posts but (WHAT AN IDIOT) forgot to change my password. so, OBVIOUSLY, when i left, and i came back to the house, i had more posts.. i think it was 4 of the same message. they were really trying to put up a point here! anyway so thre the second time that it happened i was alone and i didn’t know who to call so guess who i called… TERRY. my gosh i cant believe it.. the ex of my beloved josh.. but really, i don’t think of her as that anymore.. now that i have gotten to know her better, and way better that is, she has become a bosom friend. i actually talk to her more than i talk to my other friends i left back home.. and surprisingly we keep in touch. but now that i think about it, there is no surprise really because she has become dear to my heart as well. Ü

my brother made me a testimonial in friendster.. cant paste it now but maybe tomorrow i will because this computer has a habit of not sending what i sent when i use two windows. but heck.. id try narin..

Ate! My only sister na kahit kailan hindi ko ikanhiya! bakit? kasi she’s the reason why i have grown to be this kind of man. Sha nagturo sa akin ng dos and donts ng life… hehe… she gave me inspirations that life is not what you expect but rather, it is how you make it. She taught me that every step that I do, even the smallest of all, can affect everything that will or may happen to my future! MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL KO YAN! And kung may mang gulo or anything bad at malaman ko kung nasaan ung mga taong iyong, hindi ko papatayin, siguro gulpihin ko lang… kasi masira pa buhay ko pag pinatay ko eh… AT SERYOSO AKO DUN!So everybody out there… pucha! mag-ingat ingat kayo kasi, P*******A! Gagawin ko lang lahat, wag lang masaktan ate ko!!! Hai buhay! She is the type of person na mapagkatiwalaan mo ng mga kalokohan mo at willing siya magbigay ng makakatulong na payo para tulungan ka.:D Mahilig din ciyang akuin ang lahat ng mga responsibilities… kahit sa tipong hindi na niya kaya, pipilitin parin niya… She’s the best friend, teacher, leader, and most of all sister anyone could ever have… Hindi toh bola! I wouldn’t risk my life for her kung di siya ganung kahalaga… well, i haven’t really risked my life for her… pero still, im willing… hehe… Alam ko na kahit madalas kami mag-away dati ng ate ko at magkasugat sugat pa na sobrang dami dahil sa mg kalmot, kagat, sabunot, at suntok sa mga away namin… alam ko na mahal namin ang isa’t isa! At alam ko din na kung may malagay man kahit isa sa amin sa alanganin… dadating kami para sa isa’t isa… No one and i mean no one can break us apart… except sa pera… hehe… mejo me pagkakuripot kami minsan… ehem… minsan lang… Huhu… masakit man sa akin at umalis ang ate ko at di ko man lang siya nakitang umalis, alam ko kaya niya yan… kasi kung pinalaki niya akong malakas at kayang tumayo sa sarili, kaya niya din ito… hai… miss na miss ko na ate ko… at ang hirap din ng buhay pag magkalayo kami… like for example… dati, siya kasama ko pag bumibili ako ng damit for special events… pero ngayon, grad ball ko, wala akong matakbuhan… i had to really on my other close na babaeng friends na tulungan ako… ang problema, iba ang taste nila sa ate ko. Yung style ng ate ko, un ang gusto kong style, eh, di ko magawa… kasi WALA na siya sa PINAS!!! huhu… she’s always been there with me since i was a baby… and sa totoo lang, ang hirap ng pakiramdam knowing na a big part of your life is so far far away from you… ang sakit… nakakaiyak… nakakamiss… Nakakamiss yung lahat ng mga times nang pinagsamahan namin… lahat ng mga TAKAS namin as sibling… :,,,C lahat ng mga times na umiiyak kami tapos hahanapin mo ang yakap niya… yung yakap na mahigpit… yung mararamdaman mo na kahit may mga taong galit sayo… alam mo, may nagmamahal parin sayo… Yung tipong pagniyakap ka, pipikit ka nalang kasi alam mo pwede ka na magpahinga kasi anjan lang siya sa tabi mo at babantayan ka… Ang sarap eh… nakakamis nga lang… SOBRA!:C Alam ko na matagal pa kaming magkakalayo at pinagsisisihan ko ng husto kung bakit wala ako bago siya umalis ng PINAS… yung ganda ng ate ko… wlang sinabi yung itsura niya kung gaano man siya kaganda… SOBRANG wala nang gaganda pa kung ikukumpara mo ito sa ganda niya sa loob… MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL ko ang ate ko!… Ate, sana… mag-ingat ka jan, lam ko mejo baduy ito… pero at least lahat ng nakatype dito, totoo, at galing sa puso ko… wag ka sanang padadala sa mga kulang sa pansin na tao na naghahanap lang ng gulo para mapansin sila… kaw na mismo nagturo sa akin na wag nang patulan ang mga yan… Mahal kita ate!!!! mmmmmmmmmwwwwwwwwwwwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!:)

oooh.. it worked! its really touching what he wrote.. he didnt even tell me that sumone did it again.. but he said that he really loved me and would kick the ass of whoever wrote that through his testimonial. i love him to pieces.. thank god for a brother like him.

terry made a testi as well, didn’t even ask for it but she did… and i really appreciated what she did. so there…

joshua as usual was in his ever so supportive mode. and i love him to pieces because of it..

“what won’t kill us would only make us stronger.”

and i know it will.. he was waiting for me until 3 am kanina there so i waited until it was 3 am here so we could chat before he left.. and out of the blue he was just staring at the screen and told me…

ang ganda mo.

so i was like.. WTF!?! okay lang sha…and before i could even react, he said,

“i love you.”

enough said. for someone who is as crazy in love as i am, that was enough said.

and as for my sucky day, that phrase just cleared them all. Ü

Author: angparaluman

a poster girl with no poster staying on the safe side of the road less traveled.

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